Bon Annee!!!...

A very Happy New Year to all!!!

a Huge toast to 2012 "clink"

 to a year of Love, new opportunities, Peace

and new journeys...

new beginnings, the blending of individual lives,

a deeper soul felt existence,

a time to forgive past mistakes, to cherish new moments,

to understand that by our mere appearance on this planet

we matter...

to embrace that it is never to late to change or Love

or forgive...

and that this act of self forgiveness

eradicates all the chains that bind our hearts,

to allow the universe to provide us with what we need,

versus what we think we want...

and to let go and keep hands outstretched,

so that those open hands are able to receive

what is intended to come our way...

to cultivate our passions,

and live each moment with honesty,

remembering that we are indeed all connected,

and that you are just as valuable as I am..

celebrate our differences as beautiful

instead of a negative,

may your 2012 be filled with

more hugs than handshakes..

more smiles than tears,

and more sunshine than clouds...

see you all on the flip side!

Ry

a shining star in the East...

Merry Christmas everyone.

may the blessings of this season, brighten your days,

bring peace to your loved ones,

and fill your home with Love

1 hundred in 20 eleven...

well I made it.  this is officially my One Hundredth post! I never would have thought last January, when I began this new endeavor, that I would hit this milestone in a year. As I look back, I can see how my writing has changed, I see the fun posts, and I see some filled with deep pain and loss. I thought it fitting, to take a stroll back through the past 12 months and bring what I felt was a highlight from each month and share it again with you. Each post title is a link back to the original.

January - writing, the process...

As a child I stood on the shore of the world,

bathed in the light of Something or Someone I as of yet did not know

caressed by the breeze and warmed in the Light,

my Soul was filled and my Spirit took flight,

like so many wings above me

February - there is a purpose...

But in the midst of all of this, as usually happens for me..something began to bloom.. there is a purpose to that which serves to knock us on our butts, which clears the mind of all the "small stuff" we gather around ourselves. The sudden clarity of my existence, what really matters, and what really doesn't. We are here for a reason, each one of us has a purpose for being where we are, who we are. Some become Leaders, teachers, scholars, but our own lives, how we live them, how we love them, is always why we are here. I read a quote the other day that ran something like "your life is precious and has value, if someone else could do what your life is intended to do, you wouldn't be here" and that shifted me. 

March - breathe and exhale...

feel

the breath fill you, welcoming in all that is history,

know that it changes you, heals you, educates you

taste it's dreams and colours, bask in it's flavours

feel it's tears, acknowledge it's essence

                                                                           exhale..

and repeat..

for you are also now it's history

April - who will people say you were...

of all the stuff that we gather, that fills our shelves and closets and garages to overflowing.. the picture albums full of snapshots, the jewels, the must have latest gadgets.. is this who you are? the loved ones left behind to clean up or clear our your treasures may find items that make them laugh or cry, pause to relive moments together, but is this all that is you, your essence? will they say you always drove the nicest car, lived in the best homes, took the most expensive vacations, threw the best parties.. or will they say you were loving, and caring and had the biggest heart. Will they say you were full of Joy, full of compassion and hope.. that you lived each moment to it's absolute maximum..

        when there is nothing left of you but sweet memories.. who will people say you were...

           

May - if...

                 if you didn't know, you are loved in the same way as you loved us, 

without judgement, loved for who you are, 

for all those things you went out of your way to do, things that were not your responsibility,you took them and us on as your own, 

because you wouldn't have had it any other way..

if this is to be our final chapter, there is comfort in knowing that we shall meet again.. where the sky meets the stars, I shall find you again one day, free and young and whole...

June - miracles...

I was blessed to witness a miracle today, a miracle of life..

I was with a loved one when she passed away..I say miracle because that is exactly what it feels like it was.. a calm and peaceful end to a wondrous love filled life.. I feel somehow honoured to have been near as she slipped quietly from this world, free of her struggle with illness, much like as in life with no fuss... I sit here only a short couple of hours after saying my final goodbye with a kiss to her forehead and a last touch of her loving hands.. and I am at peace... my heart is broken, shattered and I am missing her sweet laugh already, but to have been present and having her allow me to be so, has no words yet that quite fit the moment... only a stream of tears...

July - holy ground...

your wish for me is to be all this and more, never striving to deny me anything, only to add to who I am and who I can be... grounded in lessons learned, dreams fulfilled, a destiny before me larger than anything I could have envisioned on my own... 

stay with me on these sacred grounds, 

guide and shape my being into value for this place... 

move my hands and my thoughts into actions of compassion and empathy... 

dry my tears and refresh my spirit... 

knowing you are always near, always ready, always loving... 

grounds my faith and steadies my feet for the next step...

August - when my time has come...

when my time has come, know that I am just over the horizon, walking ahead on to the next adventure for my soul to experience, but I am also as close as your next thought of us together... what we share is never lost, only packed temporarily away until the next time we unwrap the moment and let it touch us again... 

good bye's are never forever, just momentary... know that when it is time for you to take your journey, when your time too has come, that I will meet you with outstretched arms, smiles, laughter and tears of joy as you appear in the distance, with each step moving closer to our blessed reunion...

September - feels like home...

so elemental in essence, sheltering and safe,

an essential blend of who and what and where I want to be...

what it feels like, that intangible almost indescribable shangri-la,

 all encompassing spirit fulfilling

place to be comforted and peaceful and blessed...

feels like home... feels like the sweetest symphony,

treasured like the most exquisite pearl...

feels like home...

October - at a loss...

I hold fast to the knowledge that I am loved, and that I Love.. my existence is filled with an array of amazing persons whom I adore... I understand more clearly that to love them and cherish them, adds colour and texture and depth to my world, and that it will also in time add sadness and grief as we inevitably lose one another... all part of the same painting, all plants in the same garden of life... for to love someone today, must include that they were brought into life to live their seasons, to flourish and then decline and fade away... just as summer roses or spring tulips burst forth into life, blossom and grow, and then fade at seasons end, so to will we fade at our seasons end...

November - transformed...

this is a story of Love which has no bounds and no chains... free to be explored and ingested and danced and sung... just one day like this, feels divine, the prospect of another and another and another feels almost indulgent, but they are ours to be lived... hand in hand, heart in heart we tread onwards to this destiny laid before us, a gift of here and now, a reward for the battle scars of the past, a reward for the unending faith that yes, this is possible and I will claim my share...

It has been quite a year. Lessons, tears, pain, but also knowledge that all of these mold and shape this person I have become, different than last year, and not the same as even tomorrow. There has been laughter and friendship, community, togetherness and finally the sweet sweet embrace of Love...

to those of you who have walked this road with me, I say Thank You, for your words of encouragement, your comments, and your being there in spirit... 

words are often my comfort, my way of getting out what my soul needs to share and shed... 

a toast...

to another 1 hundred with you... Happy New Year...

short shortbread...

so I'm not a baker per say, well let me rephrase that, I can bake, cookies,croissants, bread etc, I just prefer cooking to baking... I think its all the sifting and measuring etc.. with cooking I can just add stuff as I wish, a pinch here, a sprig of that.. much more enjoyable for me..

that is until we come to Christmas time.. and Shortbread... the stuff of Angels and by far my hands down favourite Christmas baked goody. I have to admit I have put away a fair number of these delights in my years and look forward to this tradition.
The recipe that I have shared below is the simplest and most delectable I have found. It is originally from my Aunt B's mother, and has always been referred to as Granny's Shortbread. Light and melt in your mouth, it has become "the" shortbread all others are measured by.

 I take this every year into my office as I am repeatedly asked by my coworkers if I am making it again.I still make it the same way I was first taught, a small round fluted cookie cutter, rolled thin and pricked twice on top with a fork. No sprinkles, no chocolate, just the cookie itself to melt and dissolve on your tongue.

Granny's Shortbread

1 lb Butter
1 cup sifted Icing Sugar
1 teaspoon Vanilla Extract
4 cups 5 Roses All Purpose Flour ( use a very fine baking flour)

Soften the butter to room temperature, mix in the Vanilla , the Icing Sugar and half the flour. Add the rest of the flour a little at a time until you have a stiff and non-sticky dough. The dough can be refrigerated covered, until you are ready to roll it out. Roll out to your desired thickness and place on an un-greased baking sheet. The number of cookies will depend on the thickness of the cookies that you desire. Cook at 275F until done. The trick with these is to basically dry them out, and not brown them. They should snap gently in half when done. Remove quickly from the baking sheet and place on cooling racks to stop them from cooking further. These also freeze very well in a tightly sealed container.
Simple, seasonal, and so delicious!

Finally, my wish for all of you. 

May the Christmas Season bring warm memories, 

Joy and Peace to you and yours. 

May these last 12 months be remembered with fondness 

and may you carry forward the lessons that they have taught you. 

Hold your loved ones close, 

make that long overdue telephone call, 

and celebrate our differences as gifts.

Merry Christmas

Ryan, here at Current Ripple.

moonshadow...

looking more like Halloween than 13 days before Christmas,

these fog filled, late fall sky images caught my gaze last night...

cold and damp outside,

the moon faded in and out of sight as the rolling heavy blanket of moisture drifted above...

 

naked Cherry and Apples branches paired with evergreens

caught the subdued rays of the moon...

mysterious and ethereal in its ghostly luminescence over the landscape...

as if playing hide and seek with my gaze...

 

backwards glance...

a backward glance is about all I wish to give to 2011, except for a handful of amazing moments, the rest can get chucked in the crapper for all I care. This year has been like no other, full of bad news, sadness, grief, loss, pain and questioning. far too much questioning..

and then, from out of all the crap, is blossoming a love story, new and fresh and full of promise and happiness.. through the fire of this last year, comes a rebirth of hope and joy, a freshness like the boughs of fir that adorn our mantles for the Christmas Season..

those memories that rocket through your head when you smell fresh baked shortbread cookies lining the racks in your mothers kitchen, it's the instant fresh scent of snow in the air and you know that by nightfall, everything will be a clean glistening white.. frosty and clean again..

sort of what I wish for 2012, a clean and fresh start, a shedding of the strife of 2011... a return to blissful days and dream filled nights of what lays ahead.. a deeper connection with friend and family, a changing of the Guard so to speak, with new sentinels standing guard over those whom I love..

as we approach the turning of the year, I wish for peace.. hopefully in every sense of the word.. peace in my soul, that my days will be filled with tranquil moments that allow me to peel away the scars of the last months..

my wish for all of you is the same, that this new year, this new start be filled with the fulfillment of your dreams and aspirations.. that you are able to shed that which held you back or slowed you down..

 

so I say to you 2011, thanks not for them memories eh,

oh, and don't let the door hit your ass on the way out!

a seasonal snapshot...

a sweet symphony...

each second we breathe,

is another note added to the original score of our life's sweet symphony,

each tap of the conductor's baton,

sets in motion the scales and harmonies of our existence...

the flats, the sharps, the slow simple melody of sadness,

or the brisk triumphant march of Love..

each modulation adding another layer,

deepening the experience...

this symphony encapsulates our entire existence, each new song, pinning itself to

where we were upon it's first journey through our soul..

the feeling and emotions, the sights and sounds,

all to become inextricably linked to the notes as they roll like waves onto the shore...

we walk our own tempo in time to our hearts rhythm,

this waltz of one spirit...

we search for our accompanist,

the one who completes the score and makes it magical...

our singular chords entwine to become a danced celebration,

harmonies blending to wrap us together in a soft cocoon of sweet perfection,

these days stretch out across the page

as we find our souls partner,

our beloved Duet...

breathe deeply these dulcet tones of affection,

and let them cleanse past somber concertos of their heavy notes,

replacing them with singing strings and soothing woodwinds,

drink the notes of this complete love

embrace this ballad of you and I

an Adagio, written for us...

a little glitz...

so, here we are.. rocketing towards another Christmas (yes I am using the "C" word) Season... filled with bright eyed kiddies, stressed out parents, the shopping, the hustle and the bustle, the wrapping, the mailing, and the chocolate.. oh let's talk about the chocolate... chocolate... but I digress...

I am avoiding the stress this year, have basically no shopping to do for anyone, well unless I myself spot that glittery trinket that I just have to have... I guess it's another one of those stages of getting older, when the gifts of the gatherings are about conversation and catching up, rather than the gifts of "stuff"...

don't get me wrong, the giving of gifts is still something I love to do, but now on a more personal nature, more often something "just because" more fits where I am right now.. the surprise "something" that shows up on a friends desk, or the arrival of an "I appreciate you" card in their mailbox... just those personal I was thinking about you and wanted you to know you are special to me, marked not by a single day on the calendar, but because, just because...
I sent a wicked arrangement of flowers to my Boss, who happens to be a beautiful friend, some months ago, and I only signed the card with "We appreciate everything that you do"... she still has no idea who sent them... that is my kind of giving...

I am also not giving to VISA this year, which makes me happy... I won't have to wait with baited breath come January to heft the 8 page bill onto the kitchen counter, enjoying at last, the hangover from overindulging my pin protected chip card...

So what about you? Have your giving ideals changed this year? Have you cut back, cut down, revved it up? What say you Christmas Shoppers?

now... where is the chocolate...

transformed...

it's like a life preserver, buoyant and suspending.. lifting up from the deep into the bright lights of day...
each word written, filled with hope and promise and something so fresh and rare to find... honesty and mystery all wrapped into letters and sentences, prose...

you take my breath away,

in the little things already...

you never forget in brief quiet moments, to reach out and remind me that you are here, finally here... and me knowing that in these moments.. I too am here.. fully present and cognizant of each consonant and vowel lined up in a narrative of Love...
reaching out and grasping these thoughts and visions and dreams that have been revealed as the fog dissipates silently away... finally...

this is a story of Love which has no bounds and no chains... free to be explored and ingested and danced and sung... just one day like this, feels divine, the prospect of another and another and another feels almost indulgent, but they are ours to be lived... hand in hand, heart in heart we tread onwards to this destiny laid before us, a gift of here and now, a reward for the battle scars of the past, a reward for the unending faith that yes, this is possible and I will claim my share...

and then having you read my words, and understand where they flow from and not run from such powerful emotions, lets me glimpse deep within your spirit and see the mirror images of our longings... for you are just as present in this moment... just as ready to be fulfilled and nurtured and loved for exactly who you are today... scars, fractures and dents.. for they have lent a patina to your story which is only gained from having walked each step onwards in the face of life's onslaught...

as we walk forward and begin to intertwine our existence together like heavy fruit laden grape vines, know that I am now who I was prepared to be for our journey, and that along this path I will walk beside you, until such time as you can not go on, then I shall carry you...

for my beloved, you have saved me and enriched my journey... I am blessed and transformed...

so suddenly... "You"

so suddenly, the clouds are shifting, the thick and oppressive layer of heaviness that has walked with me for these last months is starting to clear... out of the blue, pardon the pun, the air is clean and crisp and I can see the lesson hidden in all of those dark days...

"hold what is precious as if it were your own fragile glass heart,

and nurture the mystery of Love with all of your soul.."

the loss these last 12 months or so has been immense, as I have said before, more than in the last decade, and while travelling this highway, I searched for the meaning, the lesson I was to take away from all of this grief... as I am writing this, the sun is now breaking through the clouds in the sky, spilling across my face, almost signalling that I have gotten it right, that this road was one of reflection and renewal... beginnings from what had been endings... that there are still hopes and dreams and Love...

as the footsteps of my days gone past fade into the distance behind me, I can now look inward at those who no longer walk with me, and understand that their leaving was not a punishment, but instead a blessed reminder that to have loved and been in their company, however long or short, is the true gift of this place we inhabit... I understand that their gifts to me of time and laughter and love, have now become like finely woven silk, meant to cover and drape me in the essence of who they were... you may be gone physically, but I can taste the flavours of your lives now almost for the first time... and you grant me the ability to move on...

------------------------------------------------

so suddenly, I can brush away the tears, and focus on "You", striding towards me, arms outstretched and heart offered to me without impediment... "You" who have searched just as I have done, whose fears and anticipation of this connection have been wrapped up in hope and longing...

"You" reached up and tore open the sky, bringing back the blue and gold, bathing me in understanding, clarity and anticipation...
"You" who have presented yourself, here and now, the messenger of all that was to be clarified... the catalyst for this amazing transformation out of darkness into Love.

a new road stretching out in front of our existence, paved as most others with hills and valleys, some mountains and detours, but filled also with possibility and adventure...

I raise my eyes skyward, and give Thanks for lessons learned,

I give Thanks for blessings that flow like snow fed rivers...

and I Thank "You",

just so suddenly You...

I dedicate this post to "MZ", for being You, when I needed You to be.



tangled...

its all just seems so tangled up lately, everything knotted together, nothing working the way it should be... too many people passing away, and way too close to each other.. not that there ever is a good time "to go"

I have been carrying this feeling in the pit of my stomach, it seems to be always present lately, it's kept me from writing, from smiling, from being present... it's just there... tangled.. a rolling mess of anxiety, uncertainty and unease...

errors in judgement with a loved one has lead to a hopeful rebuilding process, which is better than the alternative, but none the less, a situation I would not have normally created for myself...

yet at the same time, some wonderful things have been going on, more opportunity to serve my church, an opportunity at work to be part of the integration of a new system, requests for my humble photography talents at a high profile event.. many good things to be thankful for, yet it's still there, rumbling deep down.. unshakable it seems...

I just don't know how to shake this feeling... it's almost dread like... I know it's the culmination of a years worth of loss as I have written about before.. I get that.. I just need to catch my heart up to my head...

It feels a little bit like I am pining away for something, someone... just out of reach and yet so close...

it looks a lot like the dark clouds swirling overhead outside my window right now, with off in the distance, a clearing, some blue beautiful sky... perhaps I can hope for the same clearing, my movement towards clarifying skies and some needed enlightenment...

that which sometimes breaks us, is also filled with lessons and knowledge...

this magnificent place...

oh this magnificent place, this amazing landscape I am blessed to call home...
a day long cultural journey along the Howe Sound fjord from Vancouver to Whistler which is rich in Squamish Nation Indigenous legend, and Spirit of this lands original people... the Sḵwxwú7mesh Nation (Skwxwu7mesh) people lived, hunted, fished, and celebrated their traditions for hundreds of years on this vast coastal territory.

Shannon Falls thunders down the rock face, casting an ethereal mist over the changing landscape.. you can almost hear the whispers of the peoples who stood and celebrated this lands richness..

a 600lb solid cedar canoe, hewn from one original three ton cedar log serves as a reminder of the ocean freeways that were travelled up and down this coastline... paddles dipped again and again into the life providing waters, as they travelled from permanent villages to seasonal hunting and gathering places..

mountain goat wool gathered from the trunks of trees during molting season, provided clothing, gifts and much needed protection during the long winter months.. the mountain goats were never killed for their wool, as it would be gathered yearly during the molt as they rubbed themselves against tree trunks to remove their yearly coats...

the colours of tapestry were all gleaned from a local diet, ashes from fire to create black, berries to colour in reds and purples... nothing was wasted, nothing discarded as all given from the earth was valued as a gift from the creator and was held in sacred guise..

cedar bark and roots, carefully handcrafted into jewelery, baskets, clothing, masks...
cedar bark stripped from the trunks of local trees, never more than 2 hands in width so as to not harm this precious relation who provided materials for life... long strips freely granted, and then processed into workable material..

this landscape is vast, rugged and intensely beautiful... as the trees begin their shift from green to yellow and gold, a brisk winds whispers of colder nights to come, a hint of fall's transformation into winter... the legends and stories of their ancestors will soon fill gatherings with smiles and laughter... stories of trickster ravens and killer whales, eagles and sea serpents...

these are an immensely proud people, rich in history and narrative... open to sharing their heritage and hearts... a day to listen, a day to open our minds and souls to these amazing people who understand  how precious the earth is and how intricately we are all connected to each other...

"All my relations", we are all family...

``Huy chexw``  

- Thank you in Squamish language... 

autumnal hues...

golds and gourds, 

goblins and ghosts...

ochre and oranges,

weathered and worn...

pumpkin and purple,

a plethora of plummeting plumage...

autumnal hues,

a blanket of seasons change...